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Writing Etc. – August 1, 2005

ISSN: 1545-5580

Make Your Writing Sparkle. Write Killer Queries, Get Published.

Join the brightest, most ambitious, and talented group of writers on the ‘net.

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In This Issue:

Notes from Minnesota

Beware of Gurus on Pedestals by Beth Ann Erickson

2005 Action Plan to Jumpstart Your Writing Career

We Recommend

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Greetings from Minnesota!

I bring bad news.

As you probably remember, Lucy (our Rat Terrier Wonder Dog) has attended school for the last couple years.

The absolute highlight of my week, these classes gave my husband and I time to bond with our little terrier and marvel as she flew through her agility obstacles and sat in stark attention as she attended to her obedience training.

All that has come to a very sad end.

Two weeks ago, while my beautiful niece visited our house, Maury (my husband) and I took Lucy to a regular Sunday practice session.

Ninety five degrees outside (in the shade). Lazy Sunday afternoon. I didn’t figure little Lu would perform at her best, but I didn’t particularly care if she flubbed a few of your obstacles.

We entered the facility and my niece and I sat in the row of chairs off to the side of the course. Lucy performed as graceful as ever.

One problem, though.

She just wasn’t in a big mood to tunnel. She flew over the jumps with her regular style. She trotted through the weave poles flawlessly. But as Maury released the leash to allow her to go through the tunnel, she ran to sit next to me instead.

I didn’t care. The cement next to my chair must have felt cool on her body as she flipped to her back, tail wagging furiously, as I reached to scratch her tiny belly.

However, the owner of the canine school didn’t find Lucy’s behavior acceptable. The third (maybe the fourth) time Lucy abandoned the track to come to me, the owner leaped to her feet and strode towards Lucy. Seeing the look on her face, Lucy darted behind my metal chair.

I looped Lucy’s collar with my index finger but the owner yelled, “Don’t you touch that dog!”

My eyes flew open in surprise, but I released my hand.

The owner kicked the chair to my right with a bang, leaving one of Lucy’s escape routes blocked.

Lucy peeked her head out from between mine and my nieces’ chair. Maury’s eyes glued on the owner of the school with a puzzled expression.

The owner then grasped Lucy’s two-foot leather leash and gave a yank. Lucy yelped.

Then things got nasty.

As the owner yanked Lucy forward, my little dog did the unthinkable. She snapped towards the owner’s hands.

Before you could say, “what the heck…” my fifteen pound dog was air born. Jerked from side to side, I sat gazing in horror as my little Rat Terrier flew back and forth, legs flailing, eyes bugging out their sockets.

Animal screams filled the air. The owner strung curse words together in new and creative ways. My niece (just a foot away from all the action) strained backwards in her chair trying to avoid getting slammed in the face by little Lu’s body.

Things went from bad to worse. Evidently some of Lucy’s frantic snaps hit the mark because round about now, the owner began to body slam Lucy into the nearby tunnel.

Wham! Animal scream. Curse words. Lucy made another circular motion through the air just before another slam into the tunnel.

I watched this incredible spectacle, utterly horrified.

“My god,” I remember thinking, “she’s hanging Lucy! Lucy’s gonna die….”

Then just as fast as it started, she dropped Lucy and threw her leash towards my gape-mouthed husband. As she exited the room, she turned to me and shrieked, “And YOU. You stop coddling that dog!”

Then the nightmare ended. Sort of.

The owner drove to the emergency room to tend to the puncture wounds on her hands.

I immediately called Lucy’s vet. He says she’ll probably recover fully, although he doubts she’ll enjoy agility classes anymore. He also mentioned that he’s received a number of similar reports from ex-students of this trainer. He finished by assuring us that any dog will bite while sailing through the air with a nylon noose around their neck.

It’s called a “provoked” attack and it’s not something I recommend anyone do, no matter how mellow the dog.

Imagine, nearly strangling someone’s pet simply because they left the training course on a lazy, hot Sunday afternoon. It’s absurd if you ask me.

Worst of all, after I filed a report with the local Humane Society, I was told they couldn’t do anything but “keep an ear out” for similar reports.

My heart absolutely breaks every time I look at Lucy. My heart bleeds because although I sat right there, I became powerless to stop that violence against her.

How could I have let that happen? Where was Maury? What could we have done to prevent this?

Needless to say, my niece is totally impressed with Lucy’s school. She’s retelling the story to whoever has ears, using a pillow for a visual aid.

Two weeks later and Lucy’s neck is down to its normal size. She still wheezes when her collar pulls tight so we use a harness when we take her for walks. She’s not shaking as much and doesn’t flinch when someone touches her.

And at age four, Lucy’s now a retired agility dog.

Now her only “job” at Filbert Publishing is to keep the pink elephants off the lawn. And at that, she’s a blazing success.

Enjoy your week everyone!

Beth

P.S. Here’s our best seller list… be sure to pick up a copy of each of these titles. They’re awesome.

1.      Jumpstart Your Writing Career and Snag Paying Assignments by Beth Erickson http://filbertpublishing.com/jumpstart.htm

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4.      Timecross’d: A Love Story Out Of Time by Sean Thompson http://filbertpublishing.com/timecrossd.htm

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Beware of Gurus on Pedestals

By Beth Ann Erickson

If you haven’t read this week’s Notes from Minnesota you may want to do so now because today I’m talking about gurus. Gurus we put on pedestals, to be exact.

These past two weeks I’ve engaged in mental gymnastics trying to figure out what kept me from leaping to my feet as our former dog trainer nearly hung and strangled my little Lucy (the Rat Terrier Wonder Dog).

The only thing I can think of is that despite my utter horror at watching such an incredible spectacle, in the deepest recesses of my heart, I truly believed that this dog trainer would never do anything to harm Lucy. I’d just spent the last two years training under this woman’s tutelage and despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary… evidence unfolding one foot from my face… I still didn’t (or couldn’t) manage any reaction beyond a gape-faced expression on my face.

Ah, but what does this situation have to do with the craft of writing?

As it turns out, lots.

You see, gurus come in every shape and size. It’s hard to pin point exactly what makes someone a “guru” but you definitely know one when you see one.

Gurus tend to create what appear to be fonts of information. They definitely generate a sense of awe in their followers.

Generally speaking, a guru is someone who is living the life you’d like to create and offers a way to help you gain that lifestyle.

When our gurus speak, we listen. We listen big. They say “do this” and we’re all over it. They tell us to jump and we scramble to oblige.

At least many of us do. And that’s what they hope we’ll do….

You’d think that as a writer, you’d be somewhat immune to the beguiling effects of gurus.

But you’d be wrong.

I know of more than one so-called writing guru who drastically inflates their income to impress their followers. I know of another guru who carries so much debt that he/she is barely able to make their payments. I know of another successful guru who pays his/her writers in a very untimely fashion because they don’t have the funds in hand to pay their freelancers.

I mention this not to pull back some super-secret cloak, but to help you realize that all is not always as it seems when it comes to some of the people who have established themselves as “gurus.”.

When you find yourself “guru-izing” a fellow writer, it’s time to step back and realize they’re not much different than you. They may not have any super-secret formulas for success. They may not have access to knowledge that you can’t find on your own. And in all likelihood, they may stretch the truth to make a sale.

As we look up to our gurus, we need to realize that they may not always be as infallible as we hoped they would be.

Which brings me back to little Lucy.

Although I thought I’d become immune to the seducing allure of “guru-ism” I’d (without realizing it) succeeded in making the owner of Lucy’s school a guru.

After all, what would we do without a professional to interpret Lucy’s myriad of bewildering behavior?

What would we do without someone who keeps an eye on the latest and best nutritionals available to dogs?

How could we possibly be responsible dog owners if we didn’t do everything we could to help Lucy create a rich and full life?

My point?

Gurus do not corner the market on knowledge. As a writer, you know how to research. You can easily find any bit of information you’re looking for.

And when it comes to your current gurus, just take what they have to say with a grain of salt. One moment you can be living your little life and the next you can receive news that your guru isn’t all you believed them to be. And when that happens, don’t be so entangled with any one guru that you find this bit of news detrimental to your career.

The last sentence our former-dog trainer said to me was this: “To the untrained eye, what you saw that day probably looked a little violent. But….”

I didn’t listen to the rest of the sentence. This guru had thoroughly fallen off her pedestal, lost an ardent follower, and nothing she could say will erase the image of my little dog body slamming into that bright red dog tunnel.

Perhaps it’s time we dismantle a few pedestals. Then we’d be freed up enough to see our gurus for what they truly are: fellow sojourners who have traveled a little farther down the path than we have. People, just like the rest of us, who struggle, laugh, live, make mistakes, and can suffer gross misjudgments.

With so many writers currently striving to become gurus, wouldn’t it be refreshing if all of us slowed down enough to actually enjoy doing what we love? Perhaps write for writing’s sake, without a dollar sign in sight….

And in the future, when I begin to idealize someone I probably shouldn’t, all I need to do is take a long look into Lucy’s now-sad brown eyes. Watching the fire almost extinguished from their depths will remind me to use my head as well as my heart when evaluating any guru’s advice.

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Beth Ann Erickson is Queen Bee (yup… take this with a grain of salt J) of Filbert Publishing and the author of four books including:

Jumpstart Your Writing Career (http://filbertpublishing.com/jumpstart.htm),

The Almach (http://filbertpublishing.com/almach.htm), and

HeartSongs (http://filbertpublishing.com/heartsongs.htm).

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2005 Action Plan to Jumpstart Your Writing Career

It’s time to look at your own gurus, particularly your writing gurus.

Who have you idealized in your quest to make a living in this crazy profession you call “writing?”

Has this idealization helped or hindered your writing career?

Does the information this guru teaches keep you on track as you proceed towards your goals or do you find yourself on a more parallel track than you had anticipated? (For example, I once found myself following an online guru’s advice to a “T” until I realized that his focus on money, and the quickest way to earn it, totally clashed with my desire to build a strong reputable career based on solid fiction writing.)

How does your career look today compared to the way you envisioned it back when you first decided to become a freelancer? Has the gurus you followed had a hand in that transformation?

Just some thoughts as we sail into fall.

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© 2005 Filbert Publishing